I flew back to London on a cloud though I found balancing on one very tricky. Sunny was attempted in a strained way which made me feel chipper. It did.... radiant. God, I sound like I'm on drugs not just returning from a fun couple of days of post Christmas battery recharging at the seaside.
I am searching for the Welcome Home Don't Worry About Dinner banner that my family could have erected in anticipation of my return. The Apprentice has gone to the Isle of Wight but the Student and Mr Smith are home. I therefore have to perform motherly duties and be the perfect wife. It would be so nice if they had bothered to make the printer work but things like placing new cartridge in hole is just too fatiguing for them. Right, what on earth are we having for dinner? I had probably better go and squash it and work out how cook it.
I found Mr Smith at the end of the garden trying to play with his Christmas present - a leaf hoover; he's a bit 'leaf on lawn' obsessive. "It doesn't work." I bet it does. I took it apart, put it together correctly according to the instructions and presented him with it. "I raked." Technophobe and luddite.
Our hall looks enormous with no Christmas tree, our dog just looks enormous.
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